Let’s talk, shall we?
I consider this an open forum, where I share my thoughts, and you can too.
We can use this as a place to voice our opinions and/or grievances.
Today, grievance is on the menu. Hungry?
Let’s discuss the “Point-Out-What-You-Are-Doing Wrong” mom. (POWYADW)
We all know one and we don’t like her.
Her sentences usually begin with, “I don’t know if you KNOW this, but…”
or the ever popular, “No offense, but…”
how about, “You can do whatever you want, but I…”
and a favorite of mine, “Do you know your child is…”
In the early years of motherhood you encounter the breast-feeding judgers. The ones that talk and talk and talk about how great breast feeding is (no duh) and give you the sideways head look if you don’t/can’t/won’t breastfeed. Then proceed to lecture you about how you are basically killing your child if you don’t.
- Resolution: Turn to them and say, “Don’t you worry about who’s sucking on my boobs.” End of discussion, I promise you that.
Then once you hit the solid food stage there are the moms who make all their own homemade baby food and how they would NEVER feed their child the processed, cancer-in-a-jar food they sell at the supermarket.
- Resolution: Casually say, “My husband and I have made the conscious decision to feed our child processed food as an infant so our other children won’t think we love him more”. Conversation over.
As your children get older you will get to know, what I like to call, “The Video Game Police”. They will let you know that you have just killed your child’s last brain cells by letting him play Mario Cart.
- Resolution: State with full resolve, “Children with good hand eye coordination grow to be smarter, stronger and better lovers. I am improving their quality of life”. Then fancy snap and walk away.
I had a run-in with the local POWYADW Mom just yesterday. She was ALL OVER my son’s playground etiquette.
Of course I looked at her and said thank you.
I don’t think of witty comebacks until 2 hours later.
What I SHOULD have said was: “Well thank you for focusing on my child’s playground etiquette, we know averting attention from your 80’s bangs and bad breath is quite a task and I am grateful I could be of help to you today.”
I now have my words for next time.
Now that’s off my chest we can talk cupcakes. Almond Joy ones.
I started with a chocolate box mix and added some extras like shredded coconut and coconut milk…
Then I made some coconut buttercream. You have to. Your life will be happier because of it.
Then I stuck an almond on top. These are ALMOND JOY cupcakes, after all.
Then I dipped them in chocolate. You don’t HAVE to, but you will be happy if you do. Believe in the power of chocolate.
Now eat. EAT!
Chocolate Coating
Ingredients
- 2 cups milk chocolate chips
- 1 1/2 Tbsp vegetable oil or vegetable shortening
- 24 raw almonds
Instructions
- Press an almond on top of each cupcake.
- Put your frosted cupcakes in the freezer for 5 minutes.
- Meanwhile melt your chocolate chips and veg oil or shortening in a double boiler or microwave. If using microwave heat for 1 minute on 50% power, then stir. Repeat in 30 second increments (on 50% power) stirring after each until melted.
- Transfer your melted chocolate into a wide mouthed mug or a small deep bowl. You need your chocolate to be deep enough to dunk the entire top of your cupcake.
- Remove cupcakes from freezer and dunk tops into melted chocolate.
- When you are finished dunking all the cupcakes place cupcakes in refrigerator to set the chocolate.
Notes
Serve at room temperature, just leave in the fridge long enough for the chocolate to set, approx 15 minutes.
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Almond Joy Cupcakes
Ingredients
- 1 box chocolate cake mix
- 1 1/4 cup Lite Coconut Milk
- 1 cup sweetened shredded coconut
- 1/2 cup vegetable oil
- 3 eggs
Instructions
- Preheat oven to 350°
- Line muffin pan with cupcake liners.
- In a large mixing bowl combine all ingredients. Mix on low for 30 seconds. Turn mixer speed up to medium and beat for 2 minutes.
- Fill liners 1/2 full with batter.
- Bake for 15-20 minutes until centers spring back when pressed.
- Let cool completely before frosting.
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Coconut Buttercream
Ingredients
- 1 cup butter (2 sticks) room temperature
- 3/4 cup vegetable shortening
- 8 cups sifted powdered sugar
- 1/2–3/4 cup light coconut milk
- 1/2 tsp. coconut extract
Instructions
- In mixer beat together butter and shortening until smooth.
- On low mix in your powdered sugar.
- Pour in your coconut milk and coconut extract and mix until combined. Turn up speed to medium and mix for 45 seconds.
- Pipe or spread onto cupcakes. If piping use a snipped off ziplock bag or a large 1A tip on a piping bag.
dying for one of these right now. omg.
Can’t stand the POWYADW mother’s! I can stand these cupcakes, however. You had me at coconut buttercream!
Yummy, yummy in my tummy! Love these high hat cupcakes. Well, I don’t know if you know this, but I’ve always wanted to make some, however, I’m too chicken to try… the coconut makes it all the more tempting. One of these days…
I am so bad at coming up with good things to say on the spot. But I could devour these cupcakes like nobody’s business!!
These cupcakes look like they’d soothe over any bad feelings, hope that they did 🙂
I must make a confession right here on your blog. I have been one of “those” moms (ducks) please forgive me as I have also been on the receiving end of one of “those” moms as well. Trust me, I don’t become one often. What lead me to be a POWYADY last week was when I brought a basketball to the court and one little boy kept taking it from my son and I his mom was doing nothing about it. I had to take matters into my own hands and politely ask the boy to stop taking the ball, yes I was polite. LIke you however, I thought of all the things I wanted to say to the mom on my way home. 🙂 I mean my poor little boy got teary eyed. That is my confession on the playground.
Meanwhile, back to the cupcake, this makes me feel good because it looks like the dipped cones I used to get as a child. So thanks for that I will be baking these soon
Oh, you HAVE to step in when someone’s messing with your kid! That’s the exception to the rule 🙂
People like that drive me crazy, and I do not look forward to meeting them when I have children of my own. But, thank you for the witty comebacks, now I will know what to say!
These cupckaes look devine! I can’t wait to try them!! 🙂
I think it is possible that I was that mother BEFORE I was a mother. Now my children have humbled me. I now judge no one!
Cupcakes look incredible. I cannot wait to get my hands on one.
Yummy! I need to make some of these immediately! I am good with the snappy comebacks in those situations but have had to learn to bite my tongue because my son has picked up my snarky behavior 😛
I am a #1 fan of the Fancy Snap. Also, I am a quick thinker. I can comeback like nobody’s business. My husband however…not so much. Because of this, he’s not really supposed to talk to people unless I’m there to feed him his words.
Just kidding (I’m not kidding)
Cupcakes look yummy as always!! Love that swirled frosting…pretty!!